The first time I went raw I went cold turkey and made it for 4 months. Then I went totally off and back to eating every horrible thing. I gained back all of the weight I lost and once again I am looking tired and fat.

This time I decided to try and do it part way. Eat raw most of the time and not stress about it. Well it was working in the beginning. I was motivated and things were fine. Slowly however I notice my motivation began to slip and it suddenly became easier to just eat what my family was eating for dinner rather than make myself a whole separate meal. Then it was easier to do that at lunch too and heck, why not just forget the whole thing.

I have pretty much fallen off totally by eating everything cooked these last few days. I just gave up. I had so much work to do that I just couldn't bother worrying about it. It is frustrating but here is the way I am looking at it. I have found that this is a pretty common thing that happens in many different areas of my life.

I equate it to a pendulum. When in motion the pendulum swings rapidly back and forth. That is sort of what I have been doing with learning to deal with my eating habits. I swing one way to raw and then I swing the other way to unhealthy cooked and then back and forth I go.

I believe the key is that as the pendulum begins to lose its momentum it begins to slow down and the movement becomes less pronounced and begins to hang out more in the middle. That is where I am learning to live in regards to my eating. These ups and downs, failures and successes are a natural learning curve and with continued diligence I will find the middle ground.

I have decided I need to be more specific with what I will eat and what I won't eat or else I will find excuses to have a bite of this or that. Here is my new plan.

From now until the new year...

• I will have only raw food for my daytime meals - breakfast, lunch and any snacks.


• I will allow myself cooked food for dinner

After the new year...

• I will be going back to 100% raw.

I believe my pendulum is losing momentum!